The Usual Suspects of Every Record Store


Welcome to For Your Consideration, I am Nicholas La Torre and I am here to present relevant issues in music that are on my mind. I will present multiple sides of the issue for you to consider and ultimately we will try to gauge your thoughts on the issue. In today's talk, I'm taking a satirical look at the typical groups represented every time you visit a record store.

Thanks to the recent upsurge, many are now able to check out record stores these days. For a while there, it was getting hard to find a record store. In small towns, many places had given way to strip malls, which always seemed to favor more modern technology. If you could get a record, you were choosing between maybe 10-15 that were just extra pressings from modern band album releases. As I got older, I was fortunate to live in places that had old time record shops. They were just like you see in the movies and most have the typical set of characters. Check out who to expect below.

The Browser (Loiterer)

One of the single-most frustrating experiences (if you've worked retail) is the person that hangs around all day and buys absolutely....nothing. They will throw around questions and tidbits about your products, but they know they are getting out of there without having spent a dime. I imagine record stores are a bit more used to this these days, considering a trip to the record store is more of an experience than a simple purchase venture. Many let you sample the works and listen to records in the store. Also, the playlist that comes out of the shop is something that should always be examined.

Music Snobs

Ok, these assholes....Wait....let me calm. These folks are the plague of every record store, but every record store has them and sometimes, the record store needs them. They will dog all over anything you like, shout out a more obscure "better" version of whatever you are listening to, and they sometimes care more about music snobbery than they do personal hygiene. Yes, these are the high mortals of the record store and they must be challenged! They are good for one things though. When you get that customer who comes in and stumps even the employees, it's like the moment they've all been waiting for. They have to tell you exactly who they are looking for before they tell you they are garbage.

The Overpayers

These are the folks who waltz in off the street and pay double for an audiophile version of an album for one song that they barely even like. Sure, this is their way to get the foot in the door and could go on to better things, but for now, they are dropping stacks for records that do not provide the best experience. Not that the audiophile version wouldn't, but most of these albums were cut with tunes that were all provided as singles. If you have any bands who are older and released albums originally on vinyl, those are the ones to check out. You'll see how different the music is than you are used to and you will see what you have been missing about the entire culture.

Super Obscure Person

Ok, this person